Biographical Sketch
Thomas Gordon is a clinical psychologist who is the founder and
director of Effectiveness Training International, a group whose instructors
offer teachers, parents, physicians, managers, young people and others training
in discipline and group management. He has also written several parenting
books that offer teachers and parents help in teaching children to be more
self-reliant, self-controlled, responsible and cooperative.
You can order his books and learn more about them through the
following links
Gordon's basic approach is that discipline can not be achieved
through either reward or punishment but rather must be developed within the
character of the child. Gordon believes that overt authoritarian
discipline was harmful to the children leading to anti-social and
self-destructive behavior. He also doesn't believe in permissiveness and
finds this approach to be just as damaging. Rather he goes for a middle of
the road strategy with the goal of helping children make decisions that help
them control their own behavior.
Gordon's basic tenant is that
"You acquire more influence with young people when you
give up using your power to control them...and the more you use your power
to try to control people the less influence you'll have on their lives."
Gordon's Principal Concepts and Teachings
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Non controlling
methods of behavior change--methods teachers can use to influence
student behavior in a positive manner without resorting to rewards and
punishments. |
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Problem-a condition, event or situation that bothers
someone. |
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Problem Ownership-individual
troubled by a problem is said to "own" the problem. |
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Behavior Window-a visual device of Gordon's used to
determine if there is a problem and who owns it. |
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Primary Feelings-the
basic feelings one has following another person's unacceptable behavior. |
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Secondary Feelings-manufactured
feelings one senses after the difficulty is solved. For example, once a
teacher realizes a student who has been hurt on the playground will be okay,
she becomes angry because the child broke the playground rules. |
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"I" messages--messages
that tell another person how you feel about their behavior. |
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"You" messages--blaming
statements |
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Confrontive "I"
Messages-messages that attempt to influence another to stop the
unacceptable behavior. "I'm glad everyone is so excited about the
project but I can't give you your instructions unless you can hear me." |
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Shifting Gears-changing from
Confrontive to a listening posture |
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Students' Coping
Mechanisms-students react to coercive power by either running,
fighting or giving in. |
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Win-Lose conflict resolution-ends
the dispute temporarily with a winner and a loser. |
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No-Lose conflict
resolution-everyone wins |
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Door openers-words or actions
that invites folks to talk about what is on their minds |
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Active Listening-carefully
listening and demonstrating understanding of what another person is saying |
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Communication Roadblocks-comments
that can shut down student willingness to communicate |
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Preventive "I"
messages-messages that attempt to prevent future misbehavior.
"I hope we can all be quiet for the visit from the physicist. Can you
all help me to keep it quiet?" |
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Preventative "You" message--you
message to prevent future misbehavior. "You were very rude last time we
had a guest in the classroom. You made me very embarrassed. I hope
you do better this time." |
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Participative
Classroom Management-leadership approach that encourages students
to take a part in problem solving and decision making concerning the classroom
and the rules within. |
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Problem solving-a process in
which
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people clarify the problem |
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present possible solutions |
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select a solution all can live with |
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put the solution in place |
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see how the solution is working |
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